For those of you who are unversed in the legend that was last year's Super Bowl, that is a picture of New York Football Giants wide receiver Plaxico Burress catching the touchdown that gave his team the World championship.
As a Giants fan, this victory was satisfying enough, but it made me even happier that they beat the living christ out of the smug asshole, near-perfect-season, run-up-the-score-against-bad-teams, cheat-but-don't-admit-it-and-when-they-stop-cheating-they-keep-winning-because-they're-fueled-by-darkness-and-meth-amphetamines New England Patriots.
Naturally, then, I was pumped to see my G-men come out and dismantle their long-time rivals (and my home-town favorites), the Washington Redskins. The 'skins have a new coach, a new offensive system, and a bunch of injuries on defense, so they were the perfect patsies upon whom the Giants could reassert their championship-style dominance. Plaxico "If I wasn't a football player my name would be ridiculous" Burress, our hero in the picture above, caught 10 passes for 133 yards. He's the best receiver on my fantasy team, which means that I'm a big loser who plays fantasy football.
As a quick sidenote, Applebee's can suck me. Last night, I made some delicious quesadilla burgers, and I'm confident that they tasted better than this greasy pile of detritus:
I'd rather eat a homeless person.
As a Giants fan, this victory was satisfying enough, but it made me even happier that they beat the living christ out of the smug asshole, near-perfect-season, run-up-the-score-against-bad-teams, cheat-but-don't-admit-it-and-when-they-stop-cheating-they-keep-winning-because-they're-fueled-by-darkness-and-meth-amphetamines New England Patriots.
Naturally, then, I was pumped to see my G-men come out and dismantle their long-time rivals (and my home-town favorites), the Washington Redskins. The 'skins have a new coach, a new offensive system, and a bunch of injuries on defense, so they were the perfect patsies upon whom the Giants could reassert their championship-style dominance. Plaxico "If I wasn't a football player my name would be ridiculous" Burress, our hero in the picture above, caught 10 passes for 133 yards. He's the best receiver on my fantasy team, which means that I'm a big loser who plays fantasy football.
As a quick sidenote, Applebee's can suck me. Last night, I made some delicious quesadilla burgers, and I'm confident that they tasted better than this greasy pile of detritus:
I'd rather eat a homeless person.
1 comment:
Homeless people taste like farting.
Post a Comment